I've observed the behavior of men and women for quite sometime both in REAL and CYBER-World, and I tell you, there's not that much difference. It's just that here in internet we've somehow made the earth quite compact, and everything seems to be right here in front of our PC's right now or at any given time.
I don't know about you, but I kinda noticed that due to easy access and constant communication exchanges over this medium, people may not ask vital info from us directly, but they get them anyway through our "closest buddies". And like I said, there are no permanent friends nor enemies anywhere, and may I add too that regardless of distance, affinities, races, and what have you, some MEN act like butterflies, tasting (or testing in some cases) the nectar's of each flower they find in every garden. Some WOMEN, on the other hand, just like flowers, bloom to the max, showing off all that they've got just so to attract and finally win the affection of the butterflies (literally, at times, more than one).
But that is not the end of the story. Since, here, we've made everything quite compact, men and women get romantically connected, most of the time headed to Splits ville, and guess what? He ends up with someone he and the ex both know (and/or vice-versa). Talking about love triangles?..We got that here too! Shall we say: "Some one's trash is somebody Else's fortune?"
I'd say: LOVE, RECYCLED...
5/8/10
the Dumper and the Reject
Again, this is a case sensitive blog...I know... I know,
I could get "chewed" by those whose egos have been badly hurt by their "dumpers"..
But hey! wait a minute!
There's always the 2 sides of the coin, right?
I really would like to know your honest and straightforward
answers as to how you feel about being the "Dumper" or the "Reject".
Most people have a hard time accepting the fact that their relationships died
because they were "dumped" (and only because it was too late for them to realize
{or did they ever?} that they could have done better to save whatever relationships
they were into,marriage, engagement or even plain sweethearts, whatever...whatever).
Needless to say, not too many "Dumpers" have the conscience to even feel sorry that
they had to do what they think what needs to be done,
because probably the situation was way beyond their tolerance...
The worse part is, when the relationship ended because one decided to be unfaithful,
or is it just this >> "You've Lost That Loving Feeling" thing?...Tsk!tsk! tsk!..
.I've heard from a lot of people that it seems harder for MEN to recover from being "dumped" than the WOMEN, specially if they loved their EX'(es) so much or spent too many years with them and had children by them.
Women, on the other hand, use all the coping mechanism (thank God for that gift!) and seem to move on with grace in that given situation.
However, there are other situations or inevitable circumstances where parting ways does not really involve being any of the personal mentioned above.
It is when two people decide to separate because over-all, it was the best thing to do.
It is a very painful situation, but love and respect remained up to the last moment.
I got a beautiful diamond "separation necklace" from my last relationship...
Have you heard of that? Unique, right?..It's a long story.
I could get "chewed" by those whose egos have been badly hurt by their "dumpers"..
But hey! wait a minute!
There's always the 2 sides of the coin, right?
I really would like to know your honest and straightforward
answers as to how you feel about being the "Dumper" or the "Reject".
Most people have a hard time accepting the fact that their relationships died
because they were "dumped" (and only because it was too late for them to realize
{or did they ever?} that they could have done better to save whatever relationships
they were into,marriage, engagement or even plain sweethearts, whatever...whatever).
Needless to say, not too many "Dumpers" have the conscience to even feel sorry that
they had to do what they think what needs to be done,
because probably the situation was way beyond their tolerance...
The worse part is, when the relationship ended because one decided to be unfaithful,
or is it just this >> "You've Lost That Loving Feeling" thing?...Tsk!tsk! tsk!..
.I've heard from a lot of people that it seems harder for MEN to recover from being "dumped" than the WOMEN, specially if they loved their EX'(es) so much or spent too many years with them and had children by them.
Women, on the other hand, use all the coping mechanism (thank God for that gift!) and seem to move on with grace in that given situation.
However, there are other situations or inevitable circumstances where parting ways does not really involve being any of the personal mentioned above.
It is when two people decide to separate because over-all, it was the best thing to do.
It is a very painful situation, but love and respect remained up to the last moment.
I got a beautiful diamond "separation necklace" from my last relationship...
Have you heard of that? Unique, right?..It's a long story.
5/7/10
You know your Strong..
.......when there is no other options
but to let go! because letting go is not
giving up, It's peace of MIND...
but to let go! because letting go is not
giving up, It's peace of MIND...
Wanna Be a Blogger?
What is a blog? I say it’s something personal that you want to share in public. But I guess having a blog connotes a great responsibility from the blogger that must never be overlooked. A blog must be interesting and entertaining so readers would visit your blog over and over again. But again, interest and entertainment should be free from exploitation or ridicule of any form. Like what they say, freedom is not absolute. That is because, if you exercise your freedom and someone is hurt or damaged then that is not freedom. Why am I writing this? Well for one, as I examined some blogs here, I observed certain visible commonalities. They use their blogs to hurt someone. They use their blogs to instill hate, shame and anger towards someone I am not sure they had the chance to meet in person and have spent some time to know the person well. They base their judgments on merely exchange of words over the net. They obviously forget that the cyber world nurtures a lot of people dealing with different problems and finds the net as a solace and as an outlet to release their insecurities, frustrations and temperaments whatsoever.
I still have lots of things to say but I am not in the mood now to talk about it. Yet I am pretty sure I have made my point. So the next time a blogger neophyte starts an entry, I hope he/she ponders well what good things he/she can write about. An entry is not read based on intellectual content. I’d say just write from the heart. Use simple and honest words. I’m sure any good-natured soul with the purest intention of reading good and honest stuff would be entertained and enlightened by your entry. Smile. You don’t need to be a prolific writer to be a blogger. I for one is not. Prudence, honesty and passion are the key to a blog worth-reading. A blessed day!
I still have lots of things to say but I am not in the mood now to talk about it. Yet I am pretty sure I have made my point. So the next time a blogger neophyte starts an entry, I hope he/she ponders well what good things he/she can write about. An entry is not read based on intellectual content. I’d say just write from the heart. Use simple and honest words. I’m sure any good-natured soul with the purest intention of reading good and honest stuff would be entertained and enlightened by your entry. Smile. You don’t need to be a prolific writer to be a blogger. I for one is not. Prudence, honesty and passion are the key to a blog worth-reading. A blessed day!
5/6/10
sweet revenge
How do we respond to someone when we are mistreated or misunderstood? Do we show kindness, patience and say loving words? Or are we inclined to retaliate in anger too? Normally we do the latter (yes I am human and I react the same way when I really get pissed off!)
However, as I reflect on what is happening I was somehow enlightened. When we live under the power of the Holy Spirit, it shows in the different trials and temptations in life. It is a good test on how we respond to these situations because it shows how much we have grown in grace.
Yes, it is possible to suppress frustration and anger, and to appear calm and undisturbed by people around us. BUt if our hearts are full of God's love, we will respond to these trials with genuine patience,kindness and love.
The question is how long are we going to be patient, kind and loving to these people especially those who have hurt us or those who have said negative things about us? Personally, there is only one answer to that, SWEET REVENGE! How is it? As long as God remains in our whole being, there will never be a reason for us to get tired of loving and understanding these people. They have their own cross to bear. Their lives might be so frustrating they put us on target to release the pain and anguish they are feeling. And no matter how much love, patience and kindness we show to them, we cannot change their hearts. But I still believe what the Bible says in Ephesians 4:32, "BE KIND TO ONE ANOTHER, TENDER-HEARTED, FORGIVING ONE ANOTHER, EVEN AS GOD IN CHRIST FORGAVE YOU."
However, as I reflect on what is happening I was somehow enlightened. When we live under the power of the Holy Spirit, it shows in the different trials and temptations in life. It is a good test on how we respond to these situations because it shows how much we have grown in grace.
Yes, it is possible to suppress frustration and anger, and to appear calm and undisturbed by people around us. BUt if our hearts are full of God's love, we will respond to these trials with genuine patience,kindness and love.
The question is how long are we going to be patient, kind and loving to these people especially those who have hurt us or those who have said negative things about us? Personally, there is only one answer to that, SWEET REVENGE! How is it? As long as God remains in our whole being, there will never be a reason for us to get tired of loving and understanding these people. They have their own cross to bear. Their lives might be so frustrating they put us on target to release the pain and anguish they are feeling. And no matter how much love, patience and kindness we show to them, we cannot change their hearts. But I still believe what the Bible says in Ephesians 4:32, "BE KIND TO ONE ANOTHER, TENDER-HEARTED, FORGIVING ONE ANOTHER, EVEN AS GOD IN CHRIST FORGAVE YOU."
crab mentality
Crab mentality describes a way of thinking best described by the phrase "if I can't have it, neither can you." The metaphor refers to a pot of crabs in which one tries to escape over the side, but is relentlessly pulled down by the others in the pot.
For Filipinos, (and we are so popular to have it)crab mentality is the tendency to "outdo another at the others expense" or to "pull down those who strive to be better."
Sometimes, crab mentality also applies to those who seek to grab the spot of someone who is so popular and loved by most. The obvious attempt to outdo that person just to win the spotlight is so convincing, but in the end, the wicked act wears itself out, because people, sure,can tell the difference...
HAPPY CRABBING!!
For Filipinos, (and we are so popular to have it)crab mentality is the tendency to "outdo another at the others expense" or to "pull down those who strive to be better."
Sometimes, crab mentality also applies to those who seek to grab the spot of someone who is so popular and loved by most. The obvious attempt to outdo that person just to win the spotlight is so convincing, but in the end, the wicked act wears itself out, because people, sure,can tell the difference...
HAPPY CRABBING!!
Just the right guy for me
A lot has happened lately and I want to thank you for always standing by me. For the support and love you've consistently showering upon me. I constantly tell you how thankful I am you came into my life. I've never loved this way and I was never loved this way before.
On the very first day that I saw you a vision came to me. We were in the midst of a crowd but everybody was running away from me except you. Yes my baby, I saw you drawing near. You saved me from alienation and from total decay.
A lot of people say we are not meant to be. You are labeled as a good man while I am the bitch. But you never saw it, you saw a little girl in grief and thus you didn't give up on me.Eventually you groomed a lady inside me. A lady whom you adore up to this day. I love you so much and as our special day is fast approaching I cannot help but pray and thank God for you. I never asked for total happiness I just asked God for a minute of laughter. Truly I am blessed. From now until forever I will not falter in saying how much I love and treasure you.
Always keep in mind that though this life is full of uncertainties. Somehow this heart of mine constantly wish that you are really meant for me. Time holds the key to where our lives would lead us. Yet I can assure you that even if you and I would be holding someone else hand, the air that I breath is you. That is because whatever happens half of my life belongs to you. I love you BABY KO......
On the very first day that I saw you a vision came to me. We were in the midst of a crowd but everybody was running away from me except you. Yes my baby, I saw you drawing near. You saved me from alienation and from total decay.
A lot of people say we are not meant to be. You are labeled as a good man while I am the bitch. But you never saw it, you saw a little girl in grief and thus you didn't give up on me.Eventually you groomed a lady inside me. A lady whom you adore up to this day. I love you so much and as our special day is fast approaching I cannot help but pray and thank God for you. I never asked for total happiness I just asked God for a minute of laughter. Truly I am blessed. From now until forever I will not falter in saying how much I love and treasure you.
Always keep in mind that though this life is full of uncertainties. Somehow this heart of mine constantly wish that you are really meant for me. Time holds the key to where our lives would lead us. Yet I can assure you that even if you and I would be holding someone else hand, the air that I breath is you. That is because whatever happens half of my life belongs to you. I love you BABY KO......
The Fact About Love
Anyone who has gone through the agony of losing someone she loves so much will still wish against all odds to have that love back. But sometimes, a love lost is a love gone forever. No amount of hope can bring to life a relationship that has died a natural death. Set yourself free. Let your heart spread its own wings and fly. Remember, it may rain for 40 days and 40 nights, but it won't last forever. One day, the pouring will stop and there will be plenty of branches where you can find rest. One of these is where you will build your nest and start all over again. It's never too late. Remember, You may find love and lose it, but 'WHEN IT DIES, YOU NEVER HAVE TO DIE WITH IT.' You cannot be a redeemer all your life. The best way to weigh a relationship is out in the test of fire. You cannot be a sooner of your mistake forever. We all fall and make wrong decisions, but blunders are meant not to bury us deep in misery, but to teach us the valued lessons in life.
Loving is always a learning process. With love, we learn how to care and sacrifice. We learn to share and reach out. We learn to be UNSELFISH AND GIVE MORE THAN WE RECEIVE. And when everything doesn't end well, we learn how it feels to fall, to strive back to get back on our feet and move on. This is where we learn that "LIFE D0ESN'T END WHERE OUR HEARTACHES BEGIN. THERE IS NO FUTURE IN A RELATIONSHIP OF LIES AND SELFISHNESS. IT'S TRUE, THERE IS LIFE IN LOVE." But there can still be life even after losing love if you leave the past behind and let your heart heal and give you the chance to find yourself again.
The success of a relationship lies not only in the beauty of its beginning but in its consistency. Make a choice not on impulse but a decision based on a healthy balance of mind and heart. Let us always remember that "HAPPINESS IS NOT A MATTER OF DESTINY, BUT A MATTER OF CHOICE." There comes a time in our lives when we chance upon someone so nice and beautiful, and we just find ourselves getting so intensely attracted to that person. This feeling soon becomes a part of our everyday lives and eventually consumes our thoughts and actions. The sad part of it is when we begin to realize that this person feels nothing more for us than friendship. We start our desperate attempt to get noticed and be closer, but in the end, our efforts are still unrewarded and we end up being sorry for ourselves.
"YOU DON'T HAVE TO FORGET SOMEONE YOU LOVE. WHAT YOU NEED TO LEARN IS TO ACCEPT THE REALITY WITHOUT BEING BITTER OR SORRY FOR YOURSELF. YOU ARE BETTER OFF GIVING THAT LOVE AND DEDICATION TO SOMEONE MORE DESERVING." Don't let your heart run your life. Be sensible and let your mind speak for itself. Listen not only to your feelings but to reason as well. Always remember that if you lose someone today, it means that someone better is coming tomorrow.
'IF YOU LOSE LOVE, THAT DOESN'T MEAN THAT YOU HAVE FAILED. CRY IF YOU HAVE TO, BUT MAKE SURE THAT THE TEARS WASH AWAY THE HURT AND THE BITTERNESS THAT THE PAST HAS LEFT YOU. LET GO OF YESTERDAY AND LOVE WILL FIND ITS WAY BACK TO YOU.'
And when it does, pray that it stays and lasts a lifetime. A woman on the rebound could easily fall for sweeping emotions and be made to falsely believe that she finally stumbled upon the right man, when what she just found is only someone to cover up for the love that she lost. A man who makes promises with words and not with actions may never live up to fulfill them. It's true that love can wait forever, but it is crazy to stubbornly hope for someone who doesn't even care or understand how we feel.
Loving someone is never a sin. It is what people do out of love that sometimes makes it all wrong. The selfish desire to want that person is what makes it a sin. Don't think only of your feelings, for real love doesn't have a place for selfish people. When there is love, there is always sacrifice. When we love someone, we don't easily give up on that person. Even if we get hurt badly, we always try to find a way to ease the pain and learn to understand and forgive. Loving too much doesn't hurt. It is when we expect this love to be reciprocated that we begin to seek approval and acceptance for the things we have done. And when are taken for granted and rejected, we curse the very same love that we once freely and happily offered.
'DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME WAITING FOR SOMEONE WHO NEVER REALLY CARED ABOUT HOW YOU FEEL. OPEN YOUR HEART AGAIN, AND GIVE YOURSELF THE CHANCE TO FIND THE MAN WHO WOULD MAKE LOVE WORTH THE PAIN AND THE SACRIFICE.' Just like anything else, our love grows weak and extent. Beyond that, it withers without any hope of recovery and soon dies.
'GOD WAKES US UP IN THE MIDST OF A STORM TO TEACH US A LESSON. HE TAKES AWAY PEOPLE WE LOVE, SO WE CAN LEARN TO VALUE LOVE ITSELF. HE MAKES US CRY SO HARD SO WE CAN SEE CLEARLY WHEN WE OPEN OUR EYES. HE MAKES US BITTER SO WE CAN REALIZE THERE IS NO GENUINE HAPPINESS IF WE THINK ONLY OF OUR NEEDS AND NOT OF OTHERS.'
Relationships built on jealousy and selfishness is doomed from the very beginning. The hardest part is of losing love is letting go and moving on. Most of us cry endlessly over things that could have been, but never will be. "God allows us to experience pain to make us stronger and better persons. He will see us through the most trying and difficult times in our lives. Only in our trust in Him can we learn to find joy in our tears and happiness in our sorrows." In many failed relationships, separation comes as an inevitable choice but moving on always proves to be twice as difficult as letting go. Sometimes, the end of a relationship is imposed on us, but our choice to hold on is always beyond circumstances. Letting go is a decision that can never be dictated on us. It is a resolve we make ourselves. "ACCEPTANCE IS THE KEY TO A NEW BEGINNING, AND TIME IS THE HEALER OF ALL WOUNDS." Even if the storm casts its fearful shadow, there will always be a light after darkness and lonely moments. There is always a hope for those who believe. There is always a chance for those who try.
'LOSING SOMEONE MAY NOT BE A LOSS AT ALL, BUT A BLESSING, BECAUSE SOMEONE EVEN BETTER IS YET TO COME.'
There is nothing wrong in expressing our feelings to someone we love, but we must always be sensitive to the signals that tell us when to rationalize and be sensible. There comes a time when we fall for someone who is not interested in us because his attention is focused on someone else. There are many times when we love but don't get loved in return. There are times when the sign ahead says STOP and we stubbornly head on. If we say love is unconditional, then we should not expect for anything. But why do we get frustrated when love turns sour? Because we still subconsciously seek acceptance and assurance from the people we care about.
"BEING IN LOVE CAN BE THE MOST WONDERFUL THING WE COULD EXPERIENCE, BUT IF IT BEGINS TO CONSUME OUR WHOLE BEING, THEN WE HAVE TO STOP AND LET OUR MIND AND NOT OUR HEARTS DICTATE OUR ACTIONS. ONLY WHEN WE HEART TO ACCEPT OUR FATE, AND UNDERSTAND THE MEANING OF OUR FAILURES, CAN WE TRULY GO ON WITH LIFE WITHOUT HAVING TO LOOK BACK AND CRY OVER THE THINGS THAT COULD HAVE BEEN BUT NEVER WILL BE....."
Loving is always a learning process. With love, we learn how to care and sacrifice. We learn to share and reach out. We learn to be UNSELFISH AND GIVE MORE THAN WE RECEIVE. And when everything doesn't end well, we learn how it feels to fall, to strive back to get back on our feet and move on. This is where we learn that "LIFE D0ESN'T END WHERE OUR HEARTACHES BEGIN. THERE IS NO FUTURE IN A RELATIONSHIP OF LIES AND SELFISHNESS. IT'S TRUE, THERE IS LIFE IN LOVE." But there can still be life even after losing love if you leave the past behind and let your heart heal and give you the chance to find yourself again.
The success of a relationship lies not only in the beauty of its beginning but in its consistency. Make a choice not on impulse but a decision based on a healthy balance of mind and heart. Let us always remember that "HAPPINESS IS NOT A MATTER OF DESTINY, BUT A MATTER OF CHOICE." There comes a time in our lives when we chance upon someone so nice and beautiful, and we just find ourselves getting so intensely attracted to that person. This feeling soon becomes a part of our everyday lives and eventually consumes our thoughts and actions. The sad part of it is when we begin to realize that this person feels nothing more for us than friendship. We start our desperate attempt to get noticed and be closer, but in the end, our efforts are still unrewarded and we end up being sorry for ourselves.
"YOU DON'T HAVE TO FORGET SOMEONE YOU LOVE. WHAT YOU NEED TO LEARN IS TO ACCEPT THE REALITY WITHOUT BEING BITTER OR SORRY FOR YOURSELF. YOU ARE BETTER OFF GIVING THAT LOVE AND DEDICATION TO SOMEONE MORE DESERVING." Don't let your heart run your life. Be sensible and let your mind speak for itself. Listen not only to your feelings but to reason as well. Always remember that if you lose someone today, it means that someone better is coming tomorrow.
'IF YOU LOSE LOVE, THAT DOESN'T MEAN THAT YOU HAVE FAILED. CRY IF YOU HAVE TO, BUT MAKE SURE THAT THE TEARS WASH AWAY THE HURT AND THE BITTERNESS THAT THE PAST HAS LEFT YOU. LET GO OF YESTERDAY AND LOVE WILL FIND ITS WAY BACK TO YOU.'
And when it does, pray that it stays and lasts a lifetime. A woman on the rebound could easily fall for sweeping emotions and be made to falsely believe that she finally stumbled upon the right man, when what she just found is only someone to cover up for the love that she lost. A man who makes promises with words and not with actions may never live up to fulfill them. It's true that love can wait forever, but it is crazy to stubbornly hope for someone who doesn't even care or understand how we feel.
Loving someone is never a sin. It is what people do out of love that sometimes makes it all wrong. The selfish desire to want that person is what makes it a sin. Don't think only of your feelings, for real love doesn't have a place for selfish people. When there is love, there is always sacrifice. When we love someone, we don't easily give up on that person. Even if we get hurt badly, we always try to find a way to ease the pain and learn to understand and forgive. Loving too much doesn't hurt. It is when we expect this love to be reciprocated that we begin to seek approval and acceptance for the things we have done. And when are taken for granted and rejected, we curse the very same love that we once freely and happily offered.
'DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME WAITING FOR SOMEONE WHO NEVER REALLY CARED ABOUT HOW YOU FEEL. OPEN YOUR HEART AGAIN, AND GIVE YOURSELF THE CHANCE TO FIND THE MAN WHO WOULD MAKE LOVE WORTH THE PAIN AND THE SACRIFICE.' Just like anything else, our love grows weak and extent. Beyond that, it withers without any hope of recovery and soon dies.
'GOD WAKES US UP IN THE MIDST OF A STORM TO TEACH US A LESSON. HE TAKES AWAY PEOPLE WE LOVE, SO WE CAN LEARN TO VALUE LOVE ITSELF. HE MAKES US CRY SO HARD SO WE CAN SEE CLEARLY WHEN WE OPEN OUR EYES. HE MAKES US BITTER SO WE CAN REALIZE THERE IS NO GENUINE HAPPINESS IF WE THINK ONLY OF OUR NEEDS AND NOT OF OTHERS.'
Relationships built on jealousy and selfishness is doomed from the very beginning. The hardest part is of losing love is letting go and moving on. Most of us cry endlessly over things that could have been, but never will be. "God allows us to experience pain to make us stronger and better persons. He will see us through the most trying and difficult times in our lives. Only in our trust in Him can we learn to find joy in our tears and happiness in our sorrows." In many failed relationships, separation comes as an inevitable choice but moving on always proves to be twice as difficult as letting go. Sometimes, the end of a relationship is imposed on us, but our choice to hold on is always beyond circumstances. Letting go is a decision that can never be dictated on us. It is a resolve we make ourselves. "ACCEPTANCE IS THE KEY TO A NEW BEGINNING, AND TIME IS THE HEALER OF ALL WOUNDS." Even if the storm casts its fearful shadow, there will always be a light after darkness and lonely moments. There is always a hope for those who believe. There is always a chance for those who try.
'LOSING SOMEONE MAY NOT BE A LOSS AT ALL, BUT A BLESSING, BECAUSE SOMEONE EVEN BETTER IS YET TO COME.'
There is nothing wrong in expressing our feelings to someone we love, but we must always be sensitive to the signals that tell us when to rationalize and be sensible. There comes a time when we fall for someone who is not interested in us because his attention is focused on someone else. There are many times when we love but don't get loved in return. There are times when the sign ahead says STOP and we stubbornly head on. If we say love is unconditional, then we should not expect for anything. But why do we get frustrated when love turns sour? Because we still subconsciously seek acceptance and assurance from the people we care about.
"BEING IN LOVE CAN BE THE MOST WONDERFUL THING WE COULD EXPERIENCE, BUT IF IT BEGINS TO CONSUME OUR WHOLE BEING, THEN WE HAVE TO STOP AND LET OUR MIND AND NOT OUR HEARTS DICTATE OUR ACTIONS. ONLY WHEN WE HEART TO ACCEPT OUR FATE, AND UNDERSTAND THE MEANING OF OUR FAILURES, CAN WE TRULY GO ON WITH LIFE WITHOUT HAVING TO LOOK BACK AND CRY OVER THE THINGS THAT COULD HAVE BEEN BUT NEVER WILL BE....."
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