7/26/10

jealousy tip

Don't tell me you've never been jealous. It's normal to be jealous and in fact it's healthy to be jealous cause it gives us determination to do things a little harder in order to accomplish what others have that we don't have. This is why people, companies or nations want to strive harder whether it involves money, power, love, business, sports or just want an exposure or fame to become better than others, we live in a competitive world!

This behavior becomes detrimental when it reaches the extreme level and the person in that state of mind not being aware of it. Most people who experience severe jealousy never discuss it with their close friends or family members for anxiety of being humiliated so they rather keep it onto themselves. This lead to an accumulation of anger and frustrations inside to the point of emotional breakdown. If this person can't show it through physical violence, s/he will show it by threats and other means in retaliation to hurt the person who made them felt inferior or degraded including the person who they have an emotional attachment.

Here is one tip when you're in this situation, back up and evaluate yourself. You're not admitting a defeat but mending the psychological aspect while rejuvenating yourself into the positive person you should, to regain self-esteem, the lost energy and focus in rebuilding integrity, hope and confidence..instead of adding enemies.

7/20/10

Pursuing a Perfect partner

Im not a relationship expert but I based my opinion on what I've read, first hand experience and friends who went through different relationships. If you apply these opinions don't always expect positive result coz we all know we have different agendas, characters and personalities so the results varies depending on the type of person you are.

This is very important. To know which qualities of a potential partner are most important to you, if you want someone successful, intelligent, charming, respectful, sweet, creative, friendly, simple, sensitive, romantic, independent, adventurous, communicative...and if you were asked what 5 traits of a perfect partner is important to you and you can not answer this question right away then you need some serious thinking of what you really want in a partner. Most teenagers are more predictable when they are asked this same question than adults coz they are more open in giving straight forward answer.

In fact, when it comes to romance most adults lack of knowing what traits of their partner they consider to be important in a relationship which lead to spending valuable time and energy pursuing relationship after another who they aren’t really all that excited about. People who normally do this just want to satisfy their natural urges which I consider immoral. You have to know exactly your types that will decide who are the deal makers and breakers to save you a lot of time and efforts. Not knowing who you want or aren’t really sure of who that person is could be the reason you still haven’t met the person of your dream, Miss/Mr Right..this only serve as a hindrance to you in the long run.

The second important goal is not to rush your decision to enter into a new relationship. You must have patience to evaluate your potential partner first if s/he has all the traits compatible to your character. In a long distance relationship this is fundamental. In actual relationship, it seems sex plays an important role for those who are already experienced in this matter but I suggest not to rush into it if you're looking to build a relationship. Your potential perfect partner shouldn't be someone you rush to get into the bed with, a common occurrence whether in teenagers or adults. If you do this you're already compromising your own morality and values. Just go with the flow and enjoy the ride. You will eventually come to this intimate situation in spontaneous fashion after you both built up a strong relationship.

The location where you meet your perfect partner. This one might confuse many of you coz you probably watched so many movies about romance and love affairs where couples meet in some strange location but the truth is the best place to look to meet your perfect partner could be anywhere. If you are a man and more selective then all you do is do your favorite hobbies but this time is pay more attention to women who could be interested by interpreting their body language or seduction. Don't pressumed the woman with that flirtatious smile is already taken. I'm a conservative person so a guy should always initiate the conversation. If you're into sports you might meet an opposite sex who's a fan of the sport or plays the sport, if you're a health buff you might meet her/him in a health club, a party guy will likely to meet a party girl in the clubs and if you're a religious person you might meet that perfect partner inside the church. Keep in touch with your old high school and college friends who could introduce you with people they knew.

Narrow your list when you find the potential perfect partners I mentioned above. Keep in mind that there are no such thing as a perfect partner either. The larger your list, the harder to make a choice and if you made that decision, don't expect that you're also on that person's list so always prepare for other options if you didn't achieve your desire. If you are rejected don't hold a grudge against the woman who turned you down. Continue the friendship even she has selected someone else, she might make a mistake and turn back to you.

Always be true to yourself. You'll never achieve happiness if you have to go around pretending to be someone you're not. By being honest to yourself is essential, you will attract someone who expects that quality to be conducive as positive to your personality and if that person discovered you're deceptive, you will never gain that person's trust and you'll never find true love. Honest and faithful are the most important aspects in a long distance relationship. So many women have been the victims of these online players so like mentioned on my previous blogs, be cautious.

Follow these simple steps plus anything that I didn't mention here that would help you find that rare close to perfect partner then you'll be on your way to a wonderful life with the person of your dreams.

7/1/10

I love you,BuT I don't

How is it that I love you... but I don’t?

How come that I can stay away, but not wander off very far from you?
How is it that you hold such a big space in my life, but not hold a place in my world?
How is it that I wanna make you smile, yet does not wish to be the reason behind it?
How come that I want to make you happy, but not hold your happiness?
How is it that I feel such deep tenderness, but not the romance and passion?
How come that I wanna shower your face with kisses, yet still feel the same when the time comes that you will hold another woman’s hand?
How is it that I can say I love you, yet no feel no pain should you say you love another?
And how come that I can give you my heart yet know that it does not belong to you?

...Just why is that I truly love you... but not be in love with you...

Vindictive love

When one experiences hurt, sometimes s/he has no ability to cope with it. There is a tendency to be spiteful, to take revenge, to purposely hurt back, to be resentful. But the sad part of it is that the desire to avenge from that painful experience is to hurt the "innocent", someone who is not directly involved with whatever ill feelings one is experiencing. In short, someone's got to be punished, somehow.. Is this fair?...Who cares? Someone's got to pay! No matter how much it'll cost that person...

I've heard tons of stories of women (mostly) who were wooed by men, and once they're swept off their feet in "love", the same men just "leave", with lots of alibis or without notice...Can you relate to this?

I've been enveloped with the fear of experiencing the same, so much so that I created a "wall" to protect myself from this misfortune. I was pretty close to ending up with it a couple of times in different situations (or so, I thought). But it is said that the walls we build around us to protect us from being sad and hurt, are the same walls that prevent us from experiencing the joys..And I guess, that is also true..

I was advised many times NOT to be too analytical. " Feelings are not supposed to be logical. Dangerous is the wo/man who keeps rationalizing his/her emotions. "

It is said that " All Is Fair In Love and War "...Let's not be vindictive..

6/15/10

Boy Toys, Lolitas, Cougars and Manthers





In this world where everyone NEEDS someone and something to boost their ailing egos, different types of relationships are being sought after and developed. But at times, things really happen because of LOVE... Do we really have to explain why there are Boy toys, Lolitas, Cougars, and Manthers? Will someone have the courage to come out and testify that YES, it's perfectly fine to fall in love with someone not your age group? What does age disparity has to do with relationships? And why is it that during earlier times, it appeared one-sided, meaning, it was OKAY for older men to have relationships with younger women, while it seemed a "taboo" for older women to even consider younger men? Well, I've got good news for you, in this generation...NOT ANYMORE!

LEGEND:
Boy toy -a much younger boyfriend or husband of an older woman. In male-male relationships, a toy boy (sometimes toy boy) characterizes the one who is (and usually enjoys being) used for sexual gratification.

Lolita - a sexually precocious girl who is the object of desire of a significantly older man.

Cougar - a woman over 40 who sexually pursues younger men, typically more than eight years her junior.

Manther - the male version of a cougar.

6/12/10

Finding the right one...

now realize that patience and faith really are great virtues. For half of my existence I have experienced a lot of pain and sorrows with regards to romantic relationships.It may be wise to say that all the heartaches made me strong and a better person.I have come to shy away from my past mistakes and strived to be more mature.And now I can say I am ready to embrace true love offered by the person I truly adore and treasure.
I used to wonder how can someone feel or know matter-of-factly if a person is right for someone and if he is really THE ONE. Most people say you will just know it when he/she comes.I doubted.But love is really mysterious and enchanting.Now I am a living proof.When he came I just knew it.From the first time I met his gaze I told myself he would be a part of my life.Now he is.I am truly blessed by his presence in my life.All the mistakes I made in the past were eradicated and predominantly now I am full of positive vibe and outlook.Some might think I'm a hopeless romantic.You judge.But for me, I am just an ordinary girl who found the right person to love and to devote my whole life with.

realizing such as......

haven't been myself for quite sometimes.
maybe i got tired of my convictions and braving the storms in my life.
but then as lost as i was, surviving was really difficult without a path to follow.
and so i sought the way to what i think the wind is really leading me to go.
I appreciate though the moment when i was living a life of no ideals at all.
That was when i realized that it was not me breathing and doing my routine.
It was a part of me that i let go for awhile to experience what life can offer.
Now after that mosh pit experience, i am back...
The woman who stands up for what is true and right...
The gal who laughs at the simplest blessing that comes her way...
I've casted out the monster in me or maybe i just locked it up in one dark part of my being.... Atleast it didn't eat me up... i was able to defeat it's power over me...